March 14th, 2016
I've decided to do a mini blog here on my site. I'm starting with answering the following questions, one (or more) per day.
I got these from raymondarthur's Blog in case you want to take a look for yourself.
note: Some of these may never be answered here due to their explicit nature, or inappropriateness for a public website. I will remove those as I go along.
- What do you see yourself doing with your life in 5 years, 10 years?
I would like to be married, and travelling the world as often as possible.
In my career I would like to have achieved a management role, or a project management role. Written 3-14-16
- Have you had an experience you would say has impacted the direction of your life?
Yes, several. I had breast cancer in 2008, weight loss surgery in 2009, my mother moved to another state without me when I was 15.
- Have you had to make an important decision that affected the direction of your life?
The decision to get wls even though it could affect my home life... it did. My new happy self couldn't be with my sig-other anymore.
There was more to this story, but no need to get into that here.
- Are there people you don't like? Are there people that don't like you?
Yes and yes.
- Where do you consider good places for a couple to be romantic?
Anywhere the mood strikes. I'm definitely pro-PDA (within reason) and feel like if you love someone it shouldn't be limited to a specific time or place. If you're specifically asking about sex.... well, that's a different story. That's an at home/private place thing only. I'm no exhibitionist.
- What has been an embarrassing moment for you?
When I was a teenager I had this BIIIIG crush on a guy. We were at his house, a few friends and me and lying around on his bed talking. I must have eaten something off, because I couldn't hold back a little toot. I left very quickly after that. Not sure I ever talked to that guy again.
- Are you ever bored?
Occasionally. Isn't everybody?
- What are good leisure activities a family should try to do together?
Bowling, carnivals, beaches, and theme parks! And occasionally hikes in the woods or obscure locals. And travelling! Bahamas anyone?
- Are you okay that I still might have some feelings for my Ex?
Yes. It takes time to get over someone you invested time, and your heart in.
- What is your definition of emotional intimacy?
One where he knows my ins and outs and hasn't run away. Where I can be free to express myself without reproach or feeling belittled. Where I can love someone wholeheartedly and unabashedly and without shame. The ability to lean on, and be leaned on in times of emotional need. To be able to express my love with just a look or a touch. And know that they know.
- What do you think of this expression: Where there was fire, ashes remain.
I feel like it means that if you had an emotion that was strong for someone, hate or love, that left behind will be a little bit of that fire forever.
- What sort of future financial plans/goals do you have?
I want to be able to retire early. In the near term, I want to be debt free in the next 24 months.
- What is your biggest goal in life?
To be happy and to bring happiness to others.
- What is your favorite book/author?
David Eddings - Pawn of Prophecy... I have many though, so at some point I'll do the top 5 at least!!
- Describe yourself in 3 words.
- Tell me your 3 weaknesses.
I'm overly trusting, and yet I really trust no one.
I get attached too easily.
I have very little impulse control. I always want things right now.
- Who is your hero, do you have more than one?
- What are the most important things in life?
Love, family, and my extended family - those that others would call my friends.
- What questions would you like me to answer?
All of these, and more! I want to know everything about you all the dark and all the light and all the gray in between.
- What are your bad/good habits?
Bad: I eat when I'm bored, tired or stressed, I space off when I could be DOING something good for me, I never get up on time.
Good: I brush and floss, I love unconditionally, I pay my bills on time!
- What are your point of view of the world? Liberal/conservative, spiritual/atheist
I am a left-wing, athiest who believes in higher taxes, single-payer health care, and the death penalty.
- What would you do to leave an impression on a person on your first date?
On a first date I like to be as much myself as possible. I don't dress up very much, and I smile alot.
- What to you would the perfect life consist of?
This answer is largely dependent on whether or not I have a partner in crime to live it with.
Ideally I'd like to have a good steady job that allows for regular time off (which I already have, but I'd like a higher grade of job that's no longer in technical support.) I'd like to co-habitate with my sig other, to share bills, money, life.
When my kids are a little older, I'd love to have grandkids to spoil. I'd also like to do more for my nieces and nephews.
Sitting around most days playing video games, watching shows and movies, cuddling, and on other days getting out and having fun - whether that be time with the kids, time with the rest of the family, or going on vacation, or something as simple as a night out bowling or a trip to the beach... that would be an ideal life.
- Is there an age where being a virgin, you think, would be awkward?
It's always awkward.
- What's been your most intimate experience? Was it emotional as well as physically intimate?
Discovering myself. There's more to this answer, but you'll have to ask in person.
- Can you have emotional intimacy without physical intimacy?
You need to really know someone to be fully intimate with them, and that all starts in the head and emotionally.
- Do you still have feelings for an ex?
Yes. But to be fair, it's only been 6 months (As of March 14th) and it was a fiery relationship that ended VERY suddenly.
- How long did your most intimate relationship last?
2 years and 4 months.
- Do you regret any of those intimate experiences with that person?
Not a one.
- Have you ever had the feeling you were being watched, in general, not during, you know.
Not that I can recall.
- What was your most conflicted emotional moment?
Deciding to hospitalize myself.
- Do you usually follow your heart or your head?
As logical as I try to be, it's usually my heart that leads the way.
- What is your opinion about same gender relationships?
I think they are as beautiful as any.
- Do you think the past matters in a relationship?
Yes and no. You need to learn from the past, but you can't let it control you. You must learn to let go of that which you cannot change.
- How would you react if I told I have had a relationship with a partner of the same gender?
I would say "That's cool, how did you like it? And what made you come back?"
- Do you believe in any god or gods? Why? Are you spiritual?
No. I think that the world in all it's flaws and beauty is a complex and random thing and that we are governed only by the unbreakable laws of the universe, gravity, relativity, and all the rest. Anything we don't already know is not a mystery that only a god can solve, it's merely something we don't understand yet. When we get there we'll look back and think, "wow, why did I ever think that thing I thought before?"
- Do you have any opinions about politics?
I sure do. I want gun control, single payer healthcare, and fair taxes.
- Do you have any hobbies?
Answering these questions...
- Have you ever experimented with legal/illegal drugs?
- What do you think is the key to good parenting?
Listening, learning, and love.
- Do you like pets in the house? Do you like pets?
I do. I fancy a dog, but I they need to be clean and well kept.
- What is the weirdest thing about you to most people?
Being a little. It's so hard to explain. Not everyone knows, but to those who do it's pretty darn weird.
The weirdest thing that most people I know think - hmm... probably that I don't act my age. Though I'm not sure that's true. You tell me. What's weird about me?
- Tell me something about your first kiss.
My first kiss was a little boy in my pre-school class call Pinman.
My first "real" kiss was a boy named Greg. We were in a churchyard and he leaned in and kissed me. I think had we not been in public that kiss would have gotten us alot further!!
- If your parents don't like me for some reason, is that a deal breaker?
Hahahaha!! I'm more concerned that you won't like my parent.
- Have you ever had a one night stand? If you did, do you regret it?
Yes I have, and no I don't.
- Do you believe in soul mates?
My heart wants to say yes to this, but that wouldn't be realistic. Let's just say that I believe there is someone out there for everyone and that anybody can be happy, no that's not good enough... More than happy - ecstatic, in love, in desire with their sig other with all flaws and good things rolled into one.
I believe that my good things can match your good things whether that be equal measure or yin and yang opposites.
- Do you have a criminal record, any contraction of diseases?
- What is your dream job?
Programmer or Bakery/Coffee Shop Owner
- Are you willing to stay away from your family if you ever have to for a job?
- Which living celebrity/author/singer would you like to know?
Joseph Gordon Leavitt or Michio Kaku or Neil deGrasse Tyson
- If you could meet a famous dead person, whom would you like to meet?
Carl Sagan or Mozart
- What do you think about unfaithfulness in a relationship?
It is a definite dealbreaker. I believe that there should be enough communication in a relationship that you could see something like this coming and talk about it. Either end the relationship there or find out why the need to stray exists.
- Do you think love at first sight is possible?
Yes. The last time my first site was the back of a hawaiian shirt. We'd been talking for awhile via text, but my first site was just that. His back as he was walking toward the restaurant we'd be meeting up in.
- If your job started negatively impacting our relationship, what would you do?
Talk to you about it. Change jobs if necessary.
- Who is your favorite fictional character and why?
Silk (Prince Kheldar) from the Belgariad series. He was quick witted, and a physical adept, he was smart, sly, and still had a heart.
- Do you prefer reading books or watching movies?
Movies. They give me an instant fix that I don't get by reading. Don't get me wrong though, I LOVE reading and read several hours every week.
- Do you have any regrets in life?
There are things I'd like to have done differently, but not really, because if I had I wouldn't be me, I'd be another person.
- What is your ideal vacation?
A theme park by the ocean during late spring.
- Do you have a favorite movie?
- If you are allowed to do just one thing for the rest of your life, what would it be?
For what? Work? Life? This question is impossible to answer.
- What are some things about you that you take pride in?
My intelligence, and willingness to learn.
- What is the most courageous thing you have ever done in your life?
Deciding to live.
- What is your earliest memory?
At 3 years old my mother was fighting with one of my cousins. We lived in Arkansas at the time. He choked her and she was calling for help.
- What do you like most about you?
The ability to see good in just about everything.
- Will you be OK with me hanging out with you and your friends?
d'accord!!!! I would love it!
- If you could change something about your life, what would it be?
I would have found you sooner. ;)
- Have you ever taken dancing classes? Do you like to dance?
I haven't, but I want to, and yes I love dancing.
- Do you think it is important to learn any form of a performing art?
Yes! Very valuable indeed!
- What are you looking for in a relationship? In the long term or short term?
Love. Someone to be there for me and that I can be there for. Long term, someone willing to commit their life to me who can say without a doubt that "she is the one."
- If you have three wishes, what do would you wish for?
The ability to fly
Enough money to retire now and still be able to afford my lifestyle.
Either more wishes or djinn that would give me more wishes!!
- Which is the song that makes you happy?
Jai Ho or Brand New Day, or Happy?
- If you could have a superpower, what would be your superpower?
- Who has been the most influential person for you so far in life?
- Is there a movie that makes you cry no matter how many times you watch it?
Definitely, Maybe or Juno or Hope Floats, that part where the little girl cries - gets me every time.
- If you could change one thing about yourself physically, what would it be?
My extra skin
- What is the best advice you ever received?
- What kind of music do you like?
- If you had a previous relationship, why did your last relationship break up?
I didn't do the breaking up, what he said was that I was too paranoid.
My personal thoughts, because he wanted to talk to other women. Seeing as he moved on within 2 days of me moving out.
- Are you still friends with that person?
- What was a good moment in that relationship?
Oh gosh. All of it up to the end. We had a great sex life, talked about everything, and learned so much. I wouldn't take that relationship back for a billion dollars.
- What are the craziest things that you've done with someone?
Kind of a long story. It was when I was a teenager... wild times. Ask me in person. It's terrible. Please don't judge too harshly.
- What will you have accomplished at work/school one year from now?
I will have my CompTia certification, I will be certified in Project Management. Hopefully I will BE a manager.
- If you could go on a road trip where would you go?
Right this second -- I'd go down to California to see my best friend.
- What is the best part about family life?
Having people by your side who love you unconditionally and without requirement. Family doesn't always mean blood. Sometimes it's the family you choose.
- What is a favorite memory you have of being with your family?
When I was 11, helping my mom set up the Christmas tree for my sister. We even put out a train set that would be on when she came out!
- Tell me 3 good points about me.
You're a kindred spirit. Nerdy, fun and more.
You are SO damn smart. (Way outta my league)
You're kind and loving.
- What are your expectations of me in our relationship?
Be who you are.
Love me unconditionally.
Be there for me to lean on... I'll need you hardcore for this.
Talk to me. Never be afraid to speak what's on your mind.
- Did you ever want to kill someone?
Short answer, yes.
- Have you ever wanted something really bad and then later, not so much?
Yes, hasn't everyone?
- Is there anything I could do to make you think I am a bad person?
Lie to me or hide things from me.
- What would you do without electricity for 3 days?
Play board games and D&D and read. Lots of reading.
- Do you like to go shopping, not buying, shopping?
Yes, but I prefer buying! lol
- After I had asked you out for the first time, was there any part of you that wanted to say no?
- Where are some places you like to go on dates that might be different from where we usually go?
Well, we haven't made it to date three yet, so "usually" isn't really usual yet. I'd love to go dancing, or to a fancy schmancy event that requires us to dress up all pretty.
- What are your views on open relationships? Do you know what an open relationship is?
I believe they can be good. It isn't what I want.
- Have you ever thought of adopting a child?
I have, but if I was going to have another child I'd rather it be mine.
- Is money more important to you or are relationships you share with people more important?
People. Hands down.
- What is it that you are passionate about?
Singing... And coding... And learning!
- Do you believe long distance relationships can work?
I sure hope so!! Real answer: yes, assuming we see each other at least a couple times a week.
- What are your thoughts right now about spending the rest of your life with just one partner?
I'm open to it. (I'd love it really. That kind of security in life speaks to me.)